This article will highlight some recommendations and tips to assist you, the traveler with cancer, or help a loved one walking this path.
People really do want to help in this healing journey with cancer, though they may not know how best to do so. I believe it is incumbent upon the person diagnosed, to be honest and upfront about making their needs known. I know how hard it is to ask for help, but it is your precious life, dear one. This is the time to make your needs and desires known.
It is also important to the friend and family network to stay engaged and ask good questions.
Instead of saying “Let me know if I can help,” a better, more direct statement would be, “I’m going to the grocery store. What can I bring you?”
Another good question to ask is, “What can I do for you today to help?” You can also suggest things such as lawn mowing services, house cleaning assistance, meal delivery, help with the laundry. My sister helped us tremendously by vacuuming, cleaning my kitchen, making organic soups for my healing journey, and writing out checks for bills that needed to be paid.
A friend asked me what she could do to help. She is a good cook and enjoys it and lives close by. I asked if she could bring us dinner as that would really help and bless both my husband and me. She has since brought us many complete meals and even some for the freezer for another time. We are so blessed and so grateful.
I have also been blessed with other tangible items to help in my healing journey.
Friends have sent me food delivery gift cards, flowers, plants, a chemo self-care kit, a spa bath pillow and bath accoutrements, gloves, a prayer shawl, books, cards, candy, candles, nutritional supplements (check with your medical team before using), and countless messages and texts which have blessed my heart in countless ways. This is just a partial list of goodness and grace I have received from others.
I have a friend who lives a three hour + drive away from me in Bay Area traffic. She is supporting me by sending me cards regularly in the mail. It is such a welcome treat from medical bills! This is a wonderful treat for me to go to my mailbox and see one of her cheery envelopes. When she comes to visit me in person, it is a real delight.
So many people are supporting me in the most important of ways by sending love and light and healing prayers my way.
I have people that pray for me daily, and I can feel the love. People really do want to help and asking for their support in these ways is a benefit to the giver and receiver. Also, it is important to know when you make plans with the person walking this path with cancer, you should do it in pencil. Often, icky feeling days can interfere with those plans.
Some other ways to help can be:
Offering to drive your friend or family member to appointments, stores, etc.
Treating your friend or family member to a movie out or similar event.
Taking your friend to a park or nature center.
Asking specifically how you can be of support, assist them and follow through.
Providing financial assistance.
Providing technical assistance
This is the final blog in this series. I plan to do a follow-up once my journey is complete. Please note that each person’s journey is unique, and what may delight me may not delight another. I trust this series has been helpful.
If you’d like to find out more about my work with the Angels, please visit my website. May it bless your heart with so much love, joy, and peace.
First Published on The Wellness Universe on July 16, 2019